Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Vigilantism and the Superhero Complex

At work today the topic of suicide arose (due to the death of a co-worker's acquaintance) and we all agreed that while tragic, it's kind of fruitless. We all bring a variety of experience and credentials related to the field of death and dying considering the nature of our work (digging up dead bodies and prodding them with sharp pointy things), so I'm inclined to take our collective brainstorming abilities seriously regarding this topic.

We have a suggestion for eliminating the negative stigma associated with suicide and bettering the lives of individuals surrounding the person about to extinguish themselves.

Vigilantes with a death wish.

If life is such a repugnant thought that you simply couldn't bear seeing the sunrise one more time, amble mindlessly out of your house to court sure death situations. Dress head to toe in black and stalk the shadows, an embodiment of the scepter of death you're chasing. Loiter outside liquor stores in the dead of night, hoping for the criminal element to show themselves. Prowl from one den of iniquity to the next, busting up pimps and smacking down tweakers. Tail fire engines in order to rescue babies from burning buildings. Drop kick drunks and hide their keys in the bushes. Find a stray dog and give it to a stray kid.

Provided you survive all those tasks you will more than likely have an incredible amount of soft tissue trauma like bite and scratch marks, not to mention bloodborne pathogens that may be a concern for those high on life fools, but the promise of a slow death is no match for the immediacy of your current plans. You'll likely have broken fingers, shattered ribs, and other delightful blunt trauma injuries. Sharp pointy things and more high velocity piercing instruments will also have crossed your path that evening, leaving entrance and exit wounds guaranteed to exsanguinate that pesky essence of life from your frail, empty shell.

Assuredly, you will perish. And you will have done so in style instead of the cliche, woe-is-me-the-world-doesn't-understand-I'm-doing-everyone-a-favor-no-one-cares-if-I'm-here-or-gone song and dance.

But we're probably just misinterpreting the emotional undertones and intentions of such an act.

No comments: